By Josh Bartolomucci | May 02, 2017
By Josh Bartolomucci | December 30, 2016
What’s copied below is a conversation from our helpdesk, starting with an email sent from the contact form on our website. We felt compelled to put it on our blog.
Comment: Do you really love me? Can we go on a date or something? I really want to see how foxy you really are! :P
We are totally into you as well. Please check the following box based on your feelings towards us:
[__] I really dig you because you’re so foxy.
[__] I just want to be friends.
Why hello there foxy,
I have something to tell you before I fill out that complicated form…. I use to feel empty but then I stumbled across FoxyCart. It forever changed my life and the way I look at it… because you see… FoxyCart touched me, you know down there and although I didn’t like it at first I grew to love it, and then it stopped. I got very depressed and to an extent, suicidal. I’m not overreacting either! FoxyCart filled me with joy and ecommence goodness (a sort of white and slimy substance) and when it stopped, - FoxyCart didn’t stop per se, my computer died… so I had to rebuild it… then I had to go out and buy some new Pokémon stickers all of which took six months and 6 million dollars to do - the empty feeling started again.
Now, on to your complicated form. I kind of want to tick the second box but I also want to tick the first box because a relationship is much better if we aren’t just in it for the sexual experience. I also want you to commit to a species change. Now I know that’s a big thing to ask but I’ll give you an alternative; read up on Evolution and then just
simply, evolve. About that date that I wanted to go on with you, I’m kind of broke right now - see the part where I stated I had to rebuild my computer - so would you settle for a nice desert? There will be candles and pudding! And that’s not all! I will also have the first season of Ben 10 with me! You love anime right?
Sadly, I must finish my love filled message now but I just want to make this very clear; this is more of a test to see how willing your support is to answer those… unnecessary emails. (I have never ever never used FoxyCart but I’m strongly considering it)
This is the funniest way I’ve ever seen someone search for a suitable ecommerce package
Indeed, we do appear to be kindred spirits, destined to collide in brief moments of ecstasy before being cleaved by forces beyond our control, like being sucked into the Pokeball of life.
With deepest affection,
The views expressed in the above post are the author's own, and may not reflect those of FoxyCart.com LLC.